Caught Between Ideal & Real

The key to happiness is Balance.

Not in the way that most people would think, not a balance just between worldly matters, not a balance between health and school and work and fun. What I mean is a balance between spiritual and material life. I have been struggling with that lately, but not like most people who get so caught up in the material world they forget their soul. But rather, because every time I get satisfactorily close to God, I feel that my soul becomes quiet, isolated and separate from the world and the people around me. I do feel a certain peace inside, and a love towards everyone, but it conflicts with my generally carefree, loud, outgoing, social, and crazy personality that has been a part of me for as long as I can remember.  

I know that the soul and our lives are meant to work together in harmony, because faith is a way of life. I want so badly to live fully in both areas, so I pray to God to help me with the difficult task of balance between these two very different, yet so similar, worlds. I want to search deeper within and get even closer to the Lord, but also to use his energy and light to continue to understand and love all of his creation. I want to be Gods free spirit, but also to be alive. To work hard and play hard and love with all I have in this short and crazy life, and to be the best I can be in both worlds.The good and bad, the highs and lows, these are all a part of life. But to balance all of this with something deeper–something eternal–is much more difficult, at least for me.



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