I know and love exactly who I am and what my blessed life is all about through the good, bad, and crazy–and I give it all to God. I come from and return to Him because that is the only thing that is real and eternal, and I love, fear, respect, trust, and thank Him every day because He is in my soul and guides me in every moment with Hazir Imam. Because of this, I have the special, rare, and hard-to-understand ability to disconnect from the moment, take a step back, and see the big picture very quickly. When I get back, I am uniquely connected to the understanding that people are crazy but life is short, so whatever problem exists can be prayed about and either resolved or accepted. Although there is probably nothing I am more grateful about than this, because it allows me to be happy and help others do the same, it is also what sometimes sets me apart from a lot of the people around me, and that is something I am constantly trying to accept and balance with my feeling of social connectedness in the moment.
I have probably had the greatest half-year break from life than most people do in their entire lives, and I could not be more content with or happy about or thankful for that. But tomorrow is the week that will mark the first of August, along with the halfway mark through my decade of transition– and my cue to rejoin real life of nursing school and work (either at a music concert venue, psych facility, or with global health)–and dance classes! I know I will be crazy busy and working so hard, but I am also excited to meet new people and hope that I will have fun learning through new nursing school and life experiences as well. I hope that I will have the time to balance all of this with time for my faith, my health, and my social life. Of course I am a little scared as to what the rest of this year and the second half of my life will bring, but I know that I am ready to face all of the crazy journey of life because of everything I have just mentioned above; What is there to fear when I have God on my side? Tonight I will relax, but tomorrow I will wake up bright and early to begin the first day of the rest of my life, and despite all the insanity life has brought me lately, I could not be happier.
1) This post is in the closest color I could find to teal, because it is my favorite color at this point in my life. (Purple when I was younger.)
2) Even though my mother is a little upset about how the Nizari Reunion weekend turned out, but I couldn’t have asked for a better 3-day escape from reality!