Everyone has a checklist on what qualities they’d want in their perfect partner- good-looking, educated, kind, romantic, funny, etc.- and many people believe that only the person with everything on their list is the one who they’re meant to be with. But sometimes, you can meet someone with all of these qualities and still know that something is missing. Other times, you can meet someone who is the polar opposite of you when you least expect it, and that could be who you really end up with. So how can you tell when you’ve really found “The One”? Here is a guide on what I think really matters when determining whether your search is over for good.
- Soulmate- you have the same core beliefs on a spiritual & worldly level and understand each other at the deepest level, even in a silent peace.
- Family- no matter how many disagreements or arguments you have, you’re stuck together for life.
- Best Friend- you know each other well enough to feel comfortable enough to openly communicate on any serious topic, while at the same time being silly, having fun and enjoying each other’s company.
- Lover- you’re both attracted to each other on a physical and sexual level & have a chemistry that is undeniable
- Spouse- you and your significant other are equally trusting, respectful, and committed to each other enough to have them on your side throughout the journey of life and share a similar life vision realistically
So, the One is not always the person who has the exact same interests as you, agrees with you on every aspect of life, & has the written qualities on a checklist. Rather, it is someone who will embrace your differences, love you because of them, and take the time to understand your love language. A relationship with this person pushes you & challenges you & is anything boring, but still allows you to remain your best self (see Eight Things You Should Never Give Up For A Relationship). And somehow, magically, even in the mundaneness of an ordinary life, being around each other makes you feel like you’ve found something truly extraordinary.
Your person, as I like to call it, is the one person who, above all other people you know in the world, puts you first, unconditionally, in the same way that you’d do for them. They’re an all-in-one who has possibly been around your whole life but comes into your life at the perfect time when you’re both ready, to stay forever. Simply put, when you’ve found your soulmate, you just Know, and you’d choose that person as your partner a hundred times over again. Unfortunately, this person may not remain in your life forever, but rather only for a season to do what they are meant to do. And very fortunately, you can find Your Person in many forms in many times throughout your life, and this is one of life’s greatest blessings.