Today, I had a horrible, terrible, no-good, very-bad day. A big part of this had to do with my attitude- I was just feeling very hopeless, thinking negative, and expecting the worst. And then, as I sat in the beautiful Atlanta traffic for nearly two hours dwelling in my thoughts, I started to see things from a new perspective. These small moments of clarity made such a big difference in how I’ve been thinking about everything that’s been going on in my life lately. I am actually feeling re-energized and inspired, and overall, much better now.
I have recently learned to recognize when I’m crossing over the line from being “prepared for the worst” to “expecting the worst”, but because it’s easier said than done, I didn’t really apply it until today. Another way of thinking I was so used to is that there are only two solutions to a problem: you fix it or you let it go. There are certain problems, however, that this does not work for. So today, I learned that if I can’t let something go, but I can’t fix it either, I can still try everything in my power and hope for the best. I was also stressed and worried about a lot of things in my future, but I reminded myself that if I focus on the past or the present, I’ll miss out on all the wonderful things that I have right now.
I couldn’t even begin to explain how far I’ve come and how much I have been blessed with, especially in the last few years, but after getting a patient today whose conditions are worse than I ever could have imagined was really the best reminder to actively focus on the positive aspects of my life in this moment. Of course problems will occur. Of course people will be good and bad and come and go. And I will continue to face both internal and external challenges for as long as I live. But all I can do is my absolute best and be grateful for the all the good things and people in my life right now.